Insomnia
by Meg7100
Summary: Flashbacks are a b**** and Ryan just can't get them out of his head. It's a long night and an even longer closet with skeletons more than eager to haunt his subconscience.


**INSOMNIA**

CHAPTER 1:

"Dad, where are you going?" Ryan sat at the kitchen table, swinging his legs back and forth. He looked up at his father, who was diligently thrusting papers into his pockets and turning toward the door.

"Eat your breakfast and be a good boy." He responded, distractedly, picking up the keys off the counter.

"But, dad, I wanna' go with you! Wait!" The six year old jumped off his chair, and scampered toward his father, eagerly.

"Don't whine, Ryan! What have I told you?" Turning to face the now trembling child, he bent down, so his face was level with his. "You don't disobey me. Do you understand?"

The boy's blond hair hung in his eyes as he nodded, biting back tears. "Yes, sir."

Frank rolled his eyes at the sight of his oldest son, lethargically walking into the room. "Trey! It's about time you got your ass out of bed! Take care of him, would you?" He signalled toward Ryan, as he opened the door to get on with his course of action.

"For God's sake! I worked the night shift last night! Give me a break would ya'?"

Frank pivoted instantly, his shoes making a loud squeak on the tile floor. "What the hell did you just say to me, boy?"

"I just got home four hours ago! So fuck off!"

Frank raised his hand and slapped the scruffy haired boy across the mouth. As if to get the point across, he raised his opened palm again and again.

Ryan shuffled toward the confrontation, not knowing what to do. "Dad! Stop it! Dad!"

"Shut up, Ry! It's okay…umph. Go wait in our room!" Trey's obscured warning only made Ryan hesitate.

"Get out of here, boy! Or you'll be next!" Frank roared, slipping his belt out of the loops of his jeans. Making up his son's mind for him, Ryan hurried down the hall to his bedroom and sat perturbed on his brother's bed, waiting. Fifteen minutes later, he heard the front door slam, and Trey appeared in the doorway, hanging his head and muttering.

"I'm sorry." Ryan bowed his head in further apology. "He was gonna leave, but I wanted him to stay…"

Trey rolled his eyes at his little brother. "Don't be an idiot! It wasn't your fault, alright? I've told you before, if you're such a pushover you'll find yourself cuffed for things you didn't even do. You've gotta toughen up lil' bro!" Trey pushed his messy brown hair back with his fingers, coolly, making visible a swollen hand mark on his cheek. He smirked. "Now, c'mon. Before he comes back or mom wakes up."

"B-but…Aren't you tired? You said you just got home!" Ryan looked up at him, curiously.

"Nah." Trey smirked. "Between you and me…I didn't even go."

"But…" Ryan didn't understand. "Won't you get fired?"

"Already done." Looking at the small boy speculating him, he grinned wider. "Don't worry, Ry! There's tons of dirty bathrooms in town."

Ryan's blue eyes grew wider with innocence. "But you got fired!"

"So?"

"So…You said mom and dad are losers for getting fired!"

"Are you calling me a loser?" Trey frowned.

"No, but…but. You said…"

"Don't worry about what I said. And mom and dad are still losers." Surveying his face, Ryan was still looking unsure. "Me and you gotta stick together. Brothers just do, okay? So let's go. C'mon!"

Ryan yanked the sheets over his chest. 2:30. Three and a half more hours until he could get up. Rummaging through his brain, he began mentally reciting elements of the periodic table and their symbols. Experience coached him through the anxiety of memories. Deliberate disregard was key. So chemistry it was. _Lead-Pb. Mercury-Hg. Hydrogen-H._

Ryan rolled over onto his side. On the bright side he was going to ace his test the next day. But that wasn't always a great thing. Harbor being as competitive as it was, there were going to be awards given out at the end of the month for academic excellency and highest achieving students, and if he didn't watch out he could possibly be one of those recognized students. He smirked to himself, wondering what happened to make him go from the kid who couldn't give a damn about school, to the honour student at a top class private school. But he knew what made him this way. The Cohen's made him this way.

A rush of cool wind, whisked through the open window, forming small bumps on Ryan's arms. He put them under the covers, pulling the thick blanket over his shoulders, as he shut his eyes, failing to recall what Au symbolized.

"Trey!" Ryan standing glued to his brother's side, as he did the entire afternoon, tugged on his arm fighting for his attention.

Trey threw an annoyed glance at the impatient boy, retrieved his wrist from his grip, and turned back to the conversation. Ryan's failed attempt disheartened him for a half of a second, before he started up again.

"Trey! Come on. Shouldn't we…"

"Jesus Christ, kid! Of all days, you pick _now_ to talk? Shut your freaking mouth, would you?"

"But-but!" Thrown off a little by Trey's anger, he stammered in embarrassment. Ryan frowned, agitated. "What about dad?"

"What about him?" Trey snorted, setting off an okay to his friends to join the belittling of their father.

"What is it kid? You worried he's not gonna get his coke money in on time?" Billy, his arms crossed and head leaning back against a street light, sneered.

"Yeah, you afraid he might whip your ass or somethin? You didn't forget to wax his back did ya, squirt?" Josh smirked, leaning over the handlebars of his bike. Ryan glared at both boys, despising his brother's taste in friends.

Looking down at the ground, he mumbled. "No."

Trey, grinning from ear to ear at the comedy, looked down at the six year old, finally understanding. "Look bro. You can go back if you wanna! But I'm not. Tell that stupid son of a bitch that, too!"

Tears welling up in his eyes, Ryan willed himself not to start crying. "What? Trey, you've gotta come home!" The other boys surrounding them, laughed at Ryan's reaction.

"Aw, what's the matter? Can't your mommy take care of you?" Josh attacked him again, and Ryan clenched his fists tightly.

"Get out of here, Ry! Go home, alright? Don't worry 'bout me!"

"But… Trey?"

"He said get out of here, you little shit!" Josh shoved him hard, and Ryan fell to the ground scraping his knees and palms. He heard snickering from behind him and felt the rage burning up through his veins.

"Hey! Did you just push my little brother?" Hearing Trey's echoing yell, made him even more angry. He stayed in his position, on hands and knees, breathing hard.

"Woah, take it easy, man!" Josh's smile was legible through his voice.

Trey got closer to Josh, as he spoke: "_Never touch m_…"

Ryan launched himself at Josh, knocking him to the ground, his small fists pounding into him. There was a lot of hustling going on behind him, but no one pulled him off. He was getting angrier, but there was relief. He was finally in control. No one could stop him. But then he was getting tired and his knuckles were beginning to ache. When he was finished he allowed himself to roll to the pavement. He wiped his forehead and in the reflection of the store window, he saw his father.

**_Hey everyone. I know it's been almost two years since I've started my last story. I'm not finished with it yet, as I still have loads more that I need to type up yet-don't know if I'll ever get around to it. But here's something that I had saved from last year. I know that practically everyone has done a story like this, but I feel like this is where my Ryan Atwood forms in my other story 'You could do worst'. This might just be a one shot-_****_or maybe I'll add some. Tell me what you think!_**


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